STORY ABOUT MY JOURNEY

My flight from KL to Amsterdam was 11.00 pm. My sister Aishah and her husband Abg.Mohsin and their lovely kid Mikael sent me up to the airport and my other sister Azizah and her husband Abg.Lan and their cute kid Azham were joined us. We were gathering while having a nice food and taking some pictures and they gave me some advice. I took it and keep it in my mind :). Pretty bad my brother Fairus and his wife kakak Tina not here same to my lovely brother Firdaus.

The time was here. I shaked their hand and give some kissed for the last time even im so fucking scared. I've never been alone before i mean you know going to some place without anyone its felt awkward a lil bit and my nervous system like going to pump out. Ya so scared,it really is.

My entrance so damn far. I have to take a train to get there. Seriously theres no one like me. No Malaysian people just foreigner people. Then my num was calling out. I lined up and walk slowly to the plane entrance.

Got three side of seat. I seat in the middle one. Beside me on the left side was a european guy and the right were a couple mates. Seriously my butt so damn stucked. Its really hurt. Imagine i were sitting there like 13 hours no toilet no streaching. About the food. Firstly they served a chicken rice i ate it and for the second time they gave me a hot dog. I was like 'should i eat it or what?' then i grab it and suck into my mouth. hahahahahaha. i have no idea is it halal or not. But refer to my ticket my sister already request a muslim meal for me. So ya its okey maybe.

I arrived in Amsterdam Airport like 5.oo am. Then i've have to find my gates. Ya i do find it. I've have to lined up first. I were standing like half and hour to get to the counter ticket. Alot of people coming through. When i passing my ticket and passport to the counter suddenly he ask me.

Man : Is it your first time?

Me : Ya.

Man : Why you come here?

Me : Visiting my sister for a couple of months

Man : How long?

Me : Refer to my ticket sir

Man : Actually you cant come through.

Me : What? But i have my return ticket. So there not would be a problem

Man : If you want to get there you have to pay 300 euro.

Me : What,you cant be serious. I have to call my sister right now.

Man : Come with me.

300 euro = rm1300. In my pocket i just got 100 euro only.

Its so fucking embarrassing. People around me keep stared at me. I'm so fucking pissed off. He bring me to the emigrasion office without no reason. Why have to hold me there? And again i were standing there start from 6 am to 7.40 am. You gotta be kidding me. Im so tired. I tried so many times to call my sister Ani but i cant. Maxis You really killing me. I call my sister Aishah,i told her my current situation and ask her to call my sister Ani to call me back as soon as possible. .................... my phone was running out of battery. i dont know where the plug is but if i do find it i cant get away from there. That man keep hold me tight. Like i'm make some fucking huge mistake. Whats wrong with you people? huh? I was talking to my self 'what should i do?' i'm praying may Allah let me get away from this crab. I've have to catch my another flight at 9.00 am but now i'm still stucked here. OMG! I asked him softly.

Me : Should i stand here all night long?

Man : No idea.

Me : What should i do? I have my another flight. I have to hurry

Man : Do you have any number of your sister?

Me : Ya. 11 22 33 44 55 66

Man : No ones pick it up.

Me : Are you sure?

One more time,im getting worried. My heart was pumping so fucking fast. In my mind 'theres no other chances to get there'. I wish somebody can help me out. I wish my sister will be here. But its hopeless. Im stucked in the middle of ALIEN AIRPORT. I'm worried about my second flight. How if i miss it? My sister will be mad at me. And all the ticket will be burn. And i going to pack to Malaysian back. No i cant. I cant let it happen. I have to do something.

Me : Can you let me go?

Man : Wait a minute

Me : I cant wait anymore.

Man : No rush kid.

Me : You have no idea what was i felt right now. I told you i got my return ticket. Im begging you please let me go.

Seriously i'm going to cry. I bow my face down. With sudden

Man : Kid you off to free.

Me : Really?

Man : But you have to check in your skateboard first

I'm holding my deck in my right hand and i bearing my backpak and another bag.

Me : Where?

Man : You have to go down there and you will see the counter ticket. After you pass through you turn left and straight and take the elevator and find the check in counter for special item. Then find your gate.

Me : Thanks.

I do write it down. The time was so close. I have to rush right now right away. The counter for the special item was so far away. I found it and i check in my deck. Now i've have to find my gate. Seriously the gate is so so so so so so so so farrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr awayyyyyyyyyyyy. I keep running. I'm sweating. My cloths was wet. Thanks to Allah i made it. I get there on time.

I arrived safely in Trondheim Airport. My sister was there waiting for me. Its been a long time i never meet her. 4 years. Now i do :).

GUITAR GUITAR GUITAR

sekian lama aku tidak memegang gitar membuatkan aku rindu bak kucing di cakar tikus.
adoiiiiii. banyak lagu dah lupa. =.= . tidak dulu dok nyanyi lagu ngan Neril la Fyzz la Tika La. La ni dok saja. Bosan melanda. Ada guitar tak la bosan sangat. Leh cover lagu. BOSAN BOSAN BOSAN

BANGANG GILA :)

Semalam tengah dok kusyuk tengok movie dan kakak aku busy dengan dia punya kerja budak-budak ni dok main. Lonceng pintu berbunyi semua orang tak dengaq aku sorang ja dengaq. Aku pun pi la bukak pintu, Pompuan ni dok minta derma untuk apa tak taw. Aku dengan baik punya 'derma apa tak taw? tunggu sat na.' hahahahahahaha aku pi cakap kedah ngn minah ni. Dia dok terpinga-pinga. hahahahahahah bodo gila aku, sumpah malu gila. Nasib baik dia tak paham. haish.

BOSAN AKAN CINTA

Hahahahaha. La ni kita masuk bab cinta cintun sat na. Aku baca headline tu pun dah naik bulu roma hahahaha. Dah lama dah aku dok pikiaq pasai benda ni tapi agak keberatan nak menaip. La ni dah aku tak buat apa dengan masa yang ada baik aku isikan sedikit dekat sini.

Apa yang aku taw pasai CINTA? Cinta itu perasaan jiwa semulajadi. CINTA wujud bila hati kita tertarik pada sesiapa dengan penuh emosi dan gembira. Tapi ramai orang kata CINTA ITU BUTA?Pasai pa dia BUTA? Heran. ahahahahahhaa. Kalau CINTA MONYET baru aku kata BUTA. Sebab dengan cinta monyet ni la ramai budak-budak remaja la ni buat benda tak senonoh. Zina sana zina sini. Beranak sana beranak sini. Disebab kan kata-kata manis lelaki,perempuan sekarang jatuh bak di tendang kure-kure. Patutkah kita salahkan pada lelaki? Aku rasa memang patut. Sebab lelaki la ni pun semua macam harem. Nak keseronokan yang tiada batasan. Dengan seronok itu lah bole jadi benda yang tidak sepatutnya jadi. Memang la bak kata orang 'kita tidak dapat lari dari membuat kesalahan'. Memang betui tapi masalahnya dah taw salah dia pi buat lagi. tak ke heran? Benda banyak lagi bole buat. Awat dok gatai puki dok gatai kote tak taw. Sabaq la sat. Habiskan sekolah dulu. Lepas tu kawin senang cita. Ha lepas tu nak tutuh sana ka nk tutuh sini ka nak terbalik sana ka nk terguling sini ka ikot hang ja la. Semua atas hang.

CINTA ITU MANIS? Manis ka? Manis sekadar berkata-kata. Ini adalah satu pengajaran kepada pasangan yang baru berjinak-jinak dengan CINTA. Kenal hati budi masing-masing dahulu. Mungkin kita kenal dia dah 5 tahun,kita pun dah taw hati budi dia macam mana. Tapi ingat ALLAH tu maha kuasa mungkin dia tak tunjuk siapa diri dia sebenarnya. Aku ambek contoh orang sekeliling aku. Tidak perlu untuk aku memberitahu namanya. Dia dah kenai lama sangat mamat ni. Start sek men lagi. Dari situ depa berkawan dan berakhir dengan perkahwinan. Pertama perkahwinan si SUAMI ni dah tunjuk siapa diri dia sebenarnya. Lepas seminggu dia tunjuk lagi warna kulitnya. Sebulan dan berikutnya 'Kesesalan menghantui si ISTERI.' Si Isteri di pukul di cekik di kunci di marahi. Air mata tidak henti-henti mebasahi pipi. Dimana kata-kata manis mu? Dimana janji-janji manis mu? Bak kertas di tiup angin. 'Kerana mulut badan binasa kerana kata-kata hidup bergelora. Dengan itu 'cintailah kekasihmu sekadarnya sahaja,siapa tahu nanti akan jadi musuhmu dan bencilah musuhmu sekadarnya sahaja,siapa tahu nanti akan jadi kekasihmu' (Ali bin Abu Talib).

Aku dah banyak kali mempersoalankan bab 'perkahwinan' kat kakak aku. Aku habaq kat dia,nanti aku dah habis belajar dah ada kerja tetap aku xmau kawin. Aku nk hidup sorang2. Pasal keluarga aku bole ambil anak yatim. Aku xmau ada isteri. Kak aku pun jawab 'adik,kawin tu harus. Kita kena ramai kan umat Nabi Muhammad S.A.W.' betui kata kak aku. Tapi wanita zaman sekarang agak sukar untuk aku mempercayai dan mereka agak memilih dari aspek fizikal dan mental. Hampa pun taw kan aku ni dah la pendek. Sapa nak. Pompuan la ni nak yang semua sempurna. Aku habaq terus terang la aku tak ada awek pun tak pa. Tak pening pala. Nak kawan ngan sapa-sapa pun tak pa. Tak dak orang nk jelous2. Tak dak orang nk menghadkan masa aku. Aku bole pi mana-mana. Bole lepak ngan kawan-kawan. Tak payah nk jaga hati dia, Dia pun tak payah jaga hati aku. Tak payah nak perabis duit aku kat dia. Dengan duit tu bole aku bg mak pak aku sikit tak pun bole buat duit raya untuk anak-anak buah aku ka tak pun bole simpan sikit2 nanti leh pi jalan-jalan hahahahah. Couple ngan dia pun belum tentu kekal selamanya. I LOVE YOU, YOU LOVE ME. Jemu aku dengaq ayat tu. Semak pala ah.! Akhir sekali terpulang kepada setiap individu. Aku bagi pantun sikit 'dah masuk gear satu pi la masuk gear dua'. Aku pun dah buat keputusan. Habis belajaq baru aku nk cari orang yang betul2 menghargai diri aku ini. Buat masa sekarang --------> Harap maaf saya tidak suka bercinta :)

FOR THE FIRST TIME

Today was a great day of all. Snowing hit our place. Seriously i said for the first time i held the snow and make me felt really happy. I've never touch it never feel it never play with it. Now i do. Thanks to ALLAH cos giving me a opportunity to come here and feel the experience over here. Its really mean alot to me. AMIN. Now in my mind i want to climb the mountain and go down with my snowboarding but i have to wait a couple of weeks to make the snow gettin thick i guess.
Cant Wait

STUPID HUMAN BEING

I keep asking my self why KL people like BULLSHIT? I really didnt care where you come from. YOU RICH? YOU FROM FAMOUS FAMILY? YOU GOT GANGS? YOU HOT? So what. The point is WHO CARES? FUCK YOU!

THIS IS FOR WHO ARE ACT LIKE GOOD ENOUGH. YOU NOT PERFECT AT ALL. FUCK YOU

New Thing

After we were having our dinner,as usual my sister will make a hot tea for me. Its really nice when you can drink it with the cold environment surrounding you. Seems like peace. Then my niece Soffiya and Syuhada want to try it out. They never drink a hot tea NEVER because they said it hot. They blew the water couple of time and then take time to drink it. When i look their face kinda funny. Their mouth hahahhaa. So cute.

HYEONG JUNG

His name is Junghon Ha. I call him Hyeong because he is older than me. Hyeong mean brother.

He so nice to me. He is my first korean friend. :)

PATIENT :)

I got alot of demand. No need for me to tell it out. It usual. Normal life. But when we want to get it sometimes take time but sometimes we never reach it. Few people can get it right away without waiting. You have money its okey. NO MONEY NO TALK. But money isnt everything. So the conclusion is we have to believe in our self that we will get what we want in our life no matter hard the problem is.

Today or Tomorrow or Nextweek or Next month or Next year we live with PLEASURE,HEALTHY,LUXURY and HAPPY but we have no clue maybe later we being MISERABLE,FULL OF SADNESS,SICK or anything. This is what we call LIFE. LIFE ISNT EASY! You have to remember ALLAH always. You have to be thankful. You have to be strong with ALLAH tested. HOPE ALLAH GUIDE US IN THE RIGHT WAY. AMIN

FUN AND FULL

Today my sister brought us to EGON RESTAURANT. We went there because of the pizza. BIG PIZZA. Its really big. Pretty bad i forgot to take the picture. So tired to finish it up overall it DELICIOUS.

NOT REALIZE

BEFORE

AFTER

STROKE

I've never thought this disease will attacked my mom. She never has this kind of disease.

YA ALLAH PLEASE HELP MY MOTHER. PLEASE SAVE HER.

ALLAH PLEASE SAVE MY MOM

Today i got a call from my father. my mom was hospitalized because of falls from a chair. She tried to open the door but she falls down. She fainted. Until now she did not wake up from fainting. After heard that my sister and me was very very chocked. Tears began to wet the cheeks. Our eyes reddening. My niece keep asking why we were crying. They are small,does not understand the current situation. My sister said my mom gettin worst. This time is really bad. We started worried. The tears keep falling down. Only Allah know what exactly we were feel. I should back home and take care of my mom. I should be there. I should not come here. Now my sister trying to change my flights and get there as soon as possible. My mom is everything for us. If you ask me which one i love most i will say 'MY MOTHER'. She is my heart. She is my thought. She always in my mind. I hope everything will be fine. We have no clue between my mom truly fall from chair or not?

After hari raya my mom and my father has a big fight. They do not speak until this day. Today was the worst day of all. My mom was a weak person. She only depending on her wheelchair other than that she was suffering from diabetes. I'm feel bad to her. She keep pretending there is no problem but she were not. She trying to be patient even my father said alot of mean words to my mom. She trying to strengthen their marriage. But when this worst thing came up till my mom went to hospital. My blood system going to pump out. I'm so fucking pissed off. He should not do so to my mom. Where you put your love? You're ingnoring a very loving wife. You're a head of the family and should be an example to your children. But now you seems to keep your wife away from your life. You dont even think what will your children feel. You dont even care your wife feeling. Have you seen all of that? 36 years both of you being together. In that momment your wife was suffering with your behaviour. You never change even now you gettin old. You should be shame. You pray 24 hours non stop plus you give a lecturer in your class but why you keep doing like this? YOU SO BULLSHIT! FATHER? <===== theres is no words for me. I have no father. He does not exist. I'm not even know him. His name blew away from my mind. I will not forgive him. You offend us all. You are only eligible man in his pretense. What he has done during this days very painful. What he says very hurtful. He has no feelings of poor. Better you go from hurting us again. FUCKING BULL SHIT. IF ANYTHING HAPPEN TO MY MOM YOU THE ONLY PERSON WILL BE SORRY FOR THAT AND THERE IS NO FORGIVENESS FOR YOU. I WILL REMIND THIS TILL THE END OF WORLD

* I HOPE MY MOM WILL BE FINE AND AFTER I COME BACK TO MALAYSIA I WILL BRING MY MOM STAYING WITH MY SISTER. THATS THE ONLY WAY AND MY MOM WILL NOT HURT ANYMORE. TO MANY THINGS WE PLAN OFF. TO MANY PRESENT I WANT TO GIVE. TO MANY STORY I WANT TO SHARE WITH. I'M DONE TO MANY SINS I HOPE I COULD MAKE IT AND BEGGING FOR HER FORGIVENESS. I LOVE YOU MOM. PLEASE DONT LEAVE ME. I WILL PRAY FOR YOU. YOU HAVE TO BE STRONG.

I LOVE YOU MORE THAN YOU KNOW

TRIP TO SWEDEN

SEP 30 . 2010

We were taking the bus around 4.30 pm at MOHALT. The bus quite happy cos alot of student in our bus and foreigner like us. I'm sat next to Chinese Student and next to me were korean students. I'm quite understand what they talking about. hahahaha. Its seems like i'm in korea rite now. LOL :) Journey from Trondheim to Sweden took in 3 hours. The environment was really nice. During the journey we will see the river,the maple tree turn to yellow which is wow and the mountain. Pretty awesome. When we got there the weather really killing us. Its fucking cold then usual. Its because Sweden has snow already. The mountain full of snow. My body was shaking really bad. My niece act like nothing happend. ++ DAMN! I bought alot of chocolate :)

'END'

To many story i want to share with. Have to wait a lil bit more.

MISS YOU GUYS :(